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Monday, January 08, 2007

Total weirdo

So I've been reading a lot of these posts lately in which people complete the Weird Things meme. Only these people are not weird! Intriguing and eccentric and one-of-a-kind, yes. Quirky, sure. But not weird! I'm totally weird. Like extra body part weird. You'll have to read through the knitting content to see why.

These are my Squirrelly mittens. Well, mitten, I guess I should say.

My problem is that colorwork knitting makes me motion sick. (See, I told you I was weird!) It's something about reading the chart and carrying the yarn in both hands. I have to take a break every few minutes. Plus, these are going to come out super large and only be appropriate for someone with man hands. So the mittens and I are going to be on a break for a little while.

In the interim, I have resurrected Glee. Loyal readers will remember that things didn't go so well the last time around. But now I'm making it long-sleeved, using the Joseph Galler alpaca, and steering clear of all hot liquids. Or any liquids really.

Without any further ado, it's 6 Weird Things About Me:

1. I have three kidneys, but only one works. That's right. Three kidneys. Apparently, it's more common than you'd think. It's kind of a long and unpleasant story, but I was sick a lot as a child and underwent a lot of surgeries because my left ureter was implanted into my bladder improperly. (I know, too much info.) Along the way, we realized that I had an extra kidney, but it's basically vestigial. Just hanging out there, taking up space. So my left kidney is severely damaged because of the ureter situation and the third one never worked, so it's just the right one keeping us going here at Every Word's a Purl.

2. I hate pickles. Like in a phobic way. Not quite as bad as this lady, but bad. I cannot stand having them on plate because they contaminate everything. If they're on my sandwich, I'll have to tear away the bread that they touch (contaminate). They're just mushy yet crunchy and have warts. Blech!

3. I have an insane memory. I can recall countless stories from my childhood in excrutiating detail - like first and last names of classmates and what books we were reading and what I was wearing -- and I remember things from when I was as young as two. (My dad had a stroke then, so I feel this has something to do with it. But he's OK now, and I swear this list will get less morbid.)

4. I have an amazing internal clock and haven't worn a watch in years. To test this, Jonathan will sometimes ask me what time and, even if I haven't seen a clock in hours, I'm usually only off by a minute or two. And unless I have to get up at, like, 5 a.m., I always wake up about a minute or two before my alarm goes off. It's probably out of anxiety.

5. I'm super aggressive for my job, like sneak-into-hospitals-and-fight-with-officials aggressive, but I'm intimidated by waitstaff and salespeople in my personal life. My dinner would have to be crawling with larvae for me to send it back, and I'm often pressured into buying things I don't need. I track this back to when I was 11, and the owner of a hippie crystal shop wrongly accused me of shoplifting incense. Seriously, who shoplifts incense?

6. I sometimes mix up my left and right, and I have to look at an envelope to remember which side the stamp goes on. This is so humiliating that I'll just leave it at that.


Blogger The_Add_Knitter said...

Love the mitten, keep going! I now use the Knitpicks magnetic chart ($9) holder and that helps me from feeling weird while knitting fair isle.

10:57 PM  
Blogger Nettie said...

Okay you win, these are the weirdest 6 things that I have read so far ;). I'm kidding I think you were braver than most in what you actually posted. I love the colors for your mitten by the way.

11:45 PM  
Blogger Veronique said...

Hee hee, I love the weirdness! My cousin and my step-mother have a hard time differentiating left from right too! See? You are not alone.
Oh, and watch it in the hospitals lady! I see people lose their shit on a daily basis as I walk around the hospital, and I don't even notice it anymore... I can imagine that the staff in contact with patients is really hardened. You must have nerves of steel.

11:48 PM  
Blogger Ashley said...

Seriously, I have to make the Ls with my hands EVERY TIME to figure out which one is left. (Sometimes if I'm tired I have problems remembering which one is E and which one is 3 too, which makes me a little worried about my brain.) I'm glad I'm not alone!

12:03 AM  
Anonymous Wendy said...

Wow, I thought I had weird body anatomy by having two ureters on one side...I guess it isn't a strange as having 3 kidneys.

12:15 AM  
Blogger elizabooth said...

You're not that weird! The kidney thing is of no fault of your own and you should be proud of your memory. The stamp thing... maybe.

If it makes you feel better, when I was a teenager I was so afraid of finding a dead mouse at the bottom of my soda can, I'd have to stick a chopstick into the can and whirl it around before I could drink it. Why I didn't just pour it into a glass I'll never know.

12:20 AM  
Blogger schrodinger said...

The mitt is looking great. I love your weird list. Fantastic!! Makes me feel better about getting my left and right mixed up (I have often sent people in the wrond direction, and only realized much, much too late). 3 kidneys though - wow! And I bow down to your fantastic memory and internal clock!!!

12:30 AM  
Anonymous margaux said...

ok, you're pretty weird... although some of those i kinda understand! and i always screw my Lefts and rights... always. cute mittens!

7:56 AM  
Blogger Amy said...

You are like, so, weird! (Picture that said like John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever). Your list was really fun.

I'm looking forward to seeing your Glee! I forgot about how cute that pattern is.

7:59 AM  
Blogger gleek said...

wow, three kidneys!?! crazy! you're so weird ;) i love your list.

the squirrely mittens were awfully big but you were doing such a great job on them! maybe after glee you should try a different fair isle.

8:07 AM  
Blogger Liz K. said...

My husband insists that I refer to left turns as "your side" and right turns as "my side" when I navigate. I suck that bad at right and left. That said, I can remember how to get anywhere after having been there once.

In fact, he got really irritated with me when I managed to get us out of Baltimore on Sunday night in the driving rain. He grew up in MD, and I hadn't been there in years.

The three kidney thing is a little weird, but you're still lovably eccentric to me!

8:12 AM  
Anonymous Sarah said...

I want your internal clock. That is so cool.
Pickles literally make me gag. I'm right there with ya on that one.
The three kidney thing? Not weird. In fact, I don't think you're weird at all!
I'm loving the mittens, they are adorable.

8:35 AM  
Blogger Carrieoke said...

Dude. That kidney thing is so interesting! And I always mix up my left and my right too - like Ashley, I have to make an L with my left hand. And I'm left-handed.

The mitten looks lovely - I'm sure the man hands inside of it will be very appreciative!

8:38 AM  
Blogger KnitsnPieces said...

you are totally weird... but in a really good way! I am fascinated by your list especially the pickle bit.

9:16 AM  
Blogger mayarn said...

I understand your reasoning for not liking pickles, but they are still one of my all time favorite foods. Esp. the ones that are super crunchy and still taste like cucumbers. yum!

Oh, and I mix up my left and right all the time. I never actually "learned" the difference until I was maybe a teenager, and it still been touch and go ever since. I used to rub my first fingers on top of my middles and feel for my writing callus to figure out which was my right hand (I'm right handed).

Weirdness is sweet!

9:26 AM  
Blogger Karen said...

Your poor Glee - I know this one will go much better. Your mitten is so cute - and I don't even like squirrels. But I guess I like knitted ones, just not real ones. And don't worry - you're not any weirder than the rest of us. :)

9:31 AM  
Blogger amanda said...

The squirrels are totally freakin adorable.

your list was funny. i dont think you're weird at all. i think you're just an honest brave person for sharing and making us feel better about all our weird quirks too, so thanks!

9:33 AM  
Anonymous lisa said...

Ha ha ha!! Carrie - you're so funny!! I hope that you can make it through the squirrely mittens! Maybe go down a needle size?

10:07 AM  
Anonymous Katie said...

Squirrels are fabulous and YOU are WEIRD! In a wonderful way, of course. It's the oddities that make us who we are and give us our own personal charm. I used to hate pickles and would throw out the bread entirely if one touched it. But I'm better now; I actually like pickles. But you don't have to.

11:42 AM  
Anonymous Skylar said...

Weird, but incredibly CUTE AS PIE! I haven't commented in a long time, but I have most definitely been reading!

2:53 PM  
Blogger Jessica said...

Wow, you are weird! Hee hee. I'm with you on #3, I remember WAY too much. And I can't believe it, but I didn't know ANY of these things about you!

4:05 PM  
Blogger Kelly B said...

Carrie, I think we're twins!
1. I get ridiculous motion sickness incredibly easy- like even when watching certain TV programs!
2.I hate lettuce on sandwiches in a phobic way- to the point of ripping off the contaminated bread. For some reason I think that lettuce on sandwiches tastes like peanut butter. I like salads though.
3. My long-term memory is ridiculous as well. Not so much with the short-term, but ask me about stuff from my childhood and I'm good.
4. My internal clock is amazing.
5. I mix up left and right CONSTANTLY. It's so sad.

5:22 PM  
Blogger ae said...

that's a good list (and mitten). i share the memory thing with you - i really enjoy freaking people out by remembering tiny details they don't. hope you exploit this like i do. :)

6:23 PM  
Blogger Meredith said...

Enjoyed your list! I have two left-hand man-sized squirrel mittens myself. I never quite got the hang of gauge on that project. It was good practice though!

6:46 PM  
Blogger Melissa said...

i think this meme should be named the "interesting things about me meme"!

and your question about the whole car thing - i had help from my ex-boyfriend, but mainly did all the research, learning and reading myself. i had a lot of help with the heavy parts and getting loose a rusted bolt, but i knew where everything when and what had to come apart first. i just hope i don't forget it all when i start to put the rest back together - i could really use your memory! :)

7:29 PM  
Blogger Angela said...

I am so with you on the agressive/passive thing. I, too, have to be assertive at work, and I am excellent at dealing with many customer service issues. Send back a plate of food? NEVER! I live in fear of the disgruntled chef/server. I don't gnerally have left/right issues, but I sometimes forget which corner the stamp goes in. I do, however, LOVE pickles.

9:57 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

Three kidneys? Seriously? Wow, and the pickle thing isn't too weird. I like pickles, but what you said about the warts, yeah, that's gross.

8:52 AM  
Blogger Allegra said...

I liked your list. You're not *that* weird!! Ha! Lots of great unique things about you. The mitt looks great!

10:11 AM  
Anonymous craptina said...

i TOTALLY mix up my left and my right! we are not alone....

1:06 PM  
Blogger KnittenKnots said...

hThe squirrelly mittens are so cute...are you gonna give them another go?? I have the same issue with waitstaff and salespeople - there'd have to be something really, really seriously wrong with my meal before I'd speak up about it. Crawling with larvae would probably do it tho.

1:10 PM  
Blogger jenna said...

Almost all of my childhood memories are tied to the outfit I was wearing at the time. Not sure why...I wasn't a particularly fashionable 5 year old or anything.

The mittens look great!

2:29 PM  
Blogger MeBeth said...

Your weird list was tremendously entertaining - I am now imagining you carrying around an envelope at all times just in case someone asks you for directions.

2:39 PM  
Blogger Dorothy said...

My Dad had a tiny third kidney when he was born. There was more wrong than that and during surgery they wound up removing it.

I like the mitts. They are cute. I find I just get bored reading charts or I get lost too easily. Small mind distracted easily by sparkly stuff.

I often have to grab a pen just to see which hand wants it. That way I know the left from the right. When I drive, I have to remind myself that crossing the road means left turn and not crossing it means right turn. You aren't all that weird after all.

2:53 PM  
Blogger Yarn It said...

You are not weird....just quirky like the most of us! I love the internal clock thing. If that is weird, then I wish I was weird in that way. Very fun post to read!

8:26 PM  
Anonymous Kim P said...

Damn hippies!
I too won't send food back unless there's something really wrong (larvae or a cockroach). It's probably best not to even if you ask nicely. You never know what will happen in the kitchen. I worked in a restaurant kitchen and one of the cooks would routinely spit on food that a customer sent back before sending the food back out. Gross.

3:34 PM  
Anonymous Brooke said...

I am with you wholeheartedly on the pickle thing! Nothing can ruin my grilled cheese and fries quicker than forgetting to tell the waiter to leave off the pickle. I can't eat anything that could have pickle juice on it. Gag!

9:27 PM  
Blogger Violet said...

the squirrels look great!
(sorry i'm late to this post, i accidentally deleted a bunch of my favorite blogs on bloglines, oops!)

7:05 PM  
Blogger Kym said...

You should write to those guys who do Weird US- maybe they could feature you in their next book :)

I wish I had that clock thing you have- mine is always slow!

10:26 PM  
Anonymous frecklegirl jess said...

Mitten looks so cute- too bad it is so big... wah.

Hot beverages are very dangerous. I used to spill my drink all over my desk pretty much every week. If not more often.

Love your weird things list- one of the best I've seen. Definitely. :)

I love your clock thing- that would be so handy. The next time I see you I am totally going to test you. :)

12:47 AM  
Blogger sarah said...

Yeah, you are weird. But that's kind of cool about the kidneys. I always wanted an extra body part. That is weird.

11:44 PM  
Anonymous Jennifer said...

Cool squirrel mittens! Hilarious!

Yup, you have the weirdest "6 weird things" I've read too. I guess my second toe being longer than my big toe isn't that weird, is it? I'm glad your one out of three kidneys is working well!!!

I used to call my left hand a vestigial limb, because it was worthless. It really could do very little. That made me be really klutzy because anything that relied on both hands was pushing it! Then in college I broke my right wrist and somehow had to force my leftie to start doing more. Then a couple years later I took up knitting and I think that has really helped! My left hand CAN learn, it's so cool.

I have a friend with incredible memory too. Does yours carry over into today? Because my friend never has to study, she has basically a photographic memory for patterns, etc. It's cool being her friend because I can rely on her memories (we've known each other since middle school).


5:28 PM  
Blogger LexyKnits said...

So, I don't know how I found your blog, but I did.

Your extra kidney makes me laugh, and for that I am sorry. However I also confuse my left and right and I have to start writing something to figure it out ::blush::

P.S. the only thing weird, is normalcy.

12:44 PM  

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